Why not love yourself more.

The lack of self-love is an epidemic that continues to run through the adolescents and adult women population. I also think that depression is running rampant more than ever because of social distancing since the COVID pandemic has come along. The question that needs to be asked is: why? Why be negative? Why not want the best for yourself? Why not challenge yourself? The lack of self love saddens my soul because as humans we are so incrediabily resilient and are capable of so so much.

I come from a blended family. My mom and dad were divorced in my early years of life. Other than the usual emotions and void that comes with the cliché of having divorced parents, I can honestly say it wasn't all that bad. I was never left without, so that alone was a blessing. I always thought that that not having to share your parents with siblings allowed me to get to know them more. My parents had me in their early twenties which gave me the front row center seat to watching their blossom into adulthood. If I wasn’t close to them, especially my mom, I would have really been alone. My mom was my roommate and when I visited my dad, I had the mindset that I was just visiting my old roommate. All this is to say that despite their dysfunctional relationship with each other, their parenting was gracious. They both always told me I was great and to never let anyone tell me different. By no means will I ever say I have never doubted myself or even questioned my existence. I feel like at our lowest points the concept of reassurance is essential. What the major takeaway is, self love is a mindset. A mindset that you have to build and nurture.


The first step when building self-worth, is to stop comparing yourself to others and evaluating your every move. Experts mention that you need to challenge your critical inner voice. The critical inner voice is like a nasty coach in our heads that constantly nags us with destructive thoughts towards others or ourselves. This internalized dialogue of critical thoughts or “inner voices” undermines our sense of self-worth and even leads to self-destructive or maladaptive behaviors leadings us to feel worse about ourselves. Being able to understand why we do certain things is essential. You have to know yourself. You have to love yourself. You have to empower yourself. You have to motivate yourself. You should be your biggest fan. Have you ever heard of the saying, “you must love yourself before others can love you”…. well every bit of that saying is true.

...Dear Self, Today you will Shine!

With my journey of self-love, I am learning not to second-guess myself. I am learning to remain poise even when I feel defeated. I am learning to celebrate all my milestones without guilt. I am learning that not everyone is on my team. I am learning that my kindness is mine to give and I shouldn’t change that because certain people might take it for granted. I am learning that showing my emotions are essential. I am learning that patience is key to no matter what I am doing. I am learning that I must communicate. I am learning my spiritual strength impacts my sanity. As people, learning is never over. With growth, change occurs and reinventing yourself through time is a necessary process. I am learning that, that is ok. You just have to always remember you are worthy of all things spectacular despite your circumstances.

What are some of your challenges when it comes to your self worth? Do you too think selfworth is a mindset? Share with me your thoughts...Also, come back and check out an upcoming post, where I share with you a few books that can inspire you to continue building on your self-love.

...When you accept yourself, you will be freed from the burden of needing someone to accept you.


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